My elder brother.

i wonder wads fucking wrong wif my brother.
i understand that he feels tt he hasnt had a gd childhood, but sth this excuse is just nt enuf n is wearing thin.
he is just happy when things go wrong for us, and seemed bent on making life difficult for his family. it is not peer pressure definitely. he even told me b4 tt his friends treat their siblings like gods and dote on them excessively. he scorns his friends, thinking tt their siblings are spoilt. i don noe if they are spoilt or not, bt the bottomline is dat he doesnt believe in kindness and love for his family. he may profess differently, but he can lie to his friends, but not to his family.
he is just like my father-temper n character wise. but don tell him tt, he'll just flare up n defend himself hotly. i am nt kidding. my brother is not yr ordinary brother. maybe because of the upbringing he had. my parents did not treat him as well as he expects from them, and is jealous tt me n my younger brother is treated differently. unfortunately, my father's side treat him real good n to him, they shower him with love. this comparison made him hate them more n think tt they are just biased. i observed his reactions whenever sth happens, and he is just happier gloating abt them. i dont think i was being biased-i can be very objective n see his side of the story, but from what i have seen from his childhood n current reactions, it just dont put him in a gd light.
he doesnt get it tt my younger brother is, well, the youngest among us 3, and tt my parents are just protecting him from bullies like my brother n me(sadly. haha.) this kind of protection is normal among all parents. i am not saying tt they are right, they frustrate me sth too. wad i am trying to say is that he could have tried to understand the motives behind their protection n forgive my younger brother. just because my younger brother is protected doesnt give him the right to abuse him.
he doesnt get why my parents treat me better than him too. my parents often reward me if i perform well in my studies when i was young, and i guess it sort of stuck tt i would get priority when i am studying. for eg. few nights ago, the light in the room was problematic and i had to try the whole night to get the light on properly. i succeeded ltr, and i went to study there happily. however, when my father came hme, he automatically went into the room n wanted to play his ps, with music blasting n sound effects roaring. i am not exaggerating-ask joanne n chen long n others who talked with me on the phone b4 n complained about the background. wah piang eh. the reason why i came into the room to study was to compromise with him(but i bet he doesnt know nor understand), allowing him to play his dota outside and i wun be affected by his stupid speakers. but no. he had to interrupt me n play wherever he wants. fine. i go. the quietest in the hse was the kitchen(imagine?!). my mother saw me there n got furious. she went to scold him with a loud voice from the living room where she was standing. then my brother gt furious and went ard slamming the cup he was drinking from, using strength in wadever he does, n yup, creating loud noises to show his anger.
he just dont understand tt my parents just do not have enuf resources to ensure tt he cant get whatever he wants-be it the handphone tt he covets so openly n din get, or the love tt he thinks my parents do not show him.
wah piang eh. what a baby man. he just doesnt see tt the whole hse does not belong him alone, and tt having a bad relationship with my parents does not entitle him the right. he is 3 years older than me, no longer a teenager at the age of 21. full grown physically n ready to vote in the elections.
he is so old le, but he just cant get out of his world n realise motives. he cant even think for himself why my mum does all tt she does, and thinks tt she is just biased. he is just stuck in his own misery, wanting to pull apart this family. why cant he mature mentally, n see that for once, things are not all abt him.
but i wonder, what is he gg to do in this world, when he cant even treat his family right. i am not saying tt he cant handle his future or wad, bt wad abt his relationships??? one day he will regret, and then, nth can be done for him. i hope sth hard hit him soon. only then will he wake up to his life. bt i hope tt nth bad will happen to his family, because it will be too painful a lesson n nt fair.
i dont mean to sound so angry de, but really, my own temper is wearing thin on him n his selfishness no longer has a gd reason behind le.

9:40 am ┬╖